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Political genius and maker of games.

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Level 17 Game Developer
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Ranked as Police Officer

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Realize that getting a girl, at least in modern America*, has nothing to do with love, or connection, or common interests. It's about game. It's about saying the right things and not saying the wrong things until she decides she likes you. Kind of like getting a perfect S rank on a video game or something.

The way to get a girlfriend this summer is to realize that girls are just a numbers game. You go up to every girl and start running through level 1. You'll die a few times, but you'll eventually learn the level and pass it. Then you go to level 2, 3, 4 and so on. How many levels do these bitches have? Who knows - but you beat the game when you get laid. Sooner or later, you will beat the game with so many hoes that you'll have all these New Game +'s to choose from, then you get to pick what game you want to play. That's how life works. Girls are not individual little flowers; they are just as simple minded as guys are, just in different ways.

You're going to die on level 1 the first girl you talk to, so don't let that stop you. You already know you're going to embarrass yourself, so just get it out of the way.

Good luck.

PS - Avoid feminists at all costs. They don't count. Just because something has tits doesn't make it female.

*I myself am getting my passport and expanding my options, but this advice is if you're broke.

The Poniishow Season 1 Ep 1 Music Podcast
UMakeMeFeel House Song
King Kunta Dubstep Song
In the Burbs Pop Song
Damage Ya Hip Hop - Modern Song
Chain Trance Song
Jump Hip Hop - Modern Song
This Song Sucks (Part 2) Nerdcore Song

Recent Game Medals

Game Completed 25 Points Complete the game Medal Stats.
Firestarter 25 Points Escape the raptor Medal Stats.
SECRET MEDAL 10 Points Unlock this medal to see it's details. Medal Stats.
Chaos 5 Points Start playing. Medal Stats.
Level 2 10 Points Complete level 2 with 3 stars Medal Stats.
Level 1 10 Points Complete level 1 with 3 stars Medal Stats.
Wake Up 10 Points Finally wake up Medal Stats.
Meet Bert 5 Points Find Bert the Clown before he finds you! Medal Stats.
Medal #2 5 Points Reach level 2. Medal Stats.
Medal _13 5 Points What a pile of buffalo diarrhea! Medal Stats.

Total Medals Earned: 94 (From 40 different games.)